Archive for November, 2006

Do I want a Millionaire Husband?

Thursday, November 30th, 2006

I remember telling my mate about the researched list of characteristics that rich men look for in finding their other halves. He laughed and said:

You are too opinionated to be one of those women!

And he's right. I have been opinionated as long as I could remember. Stubborn as hell too. Since I was a child, if I hear / see / sense something that wasn't right but imposed on me, I would point it out, even though it was against the culture where I was brought up in.

Never have been a quiet, supportive woman. And way too curious about things to stop asking questions. I remember at a very young age, more than one person, including a doctor and a herbalist, asked my mother: is this your daughter? She asks so many questions!

I would not adopt someone's idea or opinion unless the reasons are well explained and logically makes sense. It takes a lot for someone to persuade me.

I also believe that I have the ability to earn money on my own. Money buys much comfort and luxury. But in the end, given my personality, I would be suffocated to death if I have to fit into the list of what an extremely rich man wants.

Personality is destiny. People really don't have to go to tarot card readers or try other methods of divination. Look at the personality, and you can predict the results.

Attracting a Millionaire Husband: Part III

Tuesday, November 28th, 2006

After taking care of the appearance, women who want to marry for money should study this list of behavior - although there may be cultural variations - adapt accordingly:

  1. Make use of proper etiquette at all situations public. Dining etiquette, speaking etiquette, communication etiquette, etc. For example, when dining, know what fork / knife / spoon to use for each course, and know which glass and bread plate are yours. When speaking, be sure you are not using slangs, and do speak in a voice that is gentle but audible.
  2. Do not assert your opinion unless you are asked (this varies according to culture).
  3. Walk at a moderate speed - do not rush. You are a high class lady, do not forget!
  4. Walk elegantly - do not walk as if you are wearing flip flops - too many women do that!
  5. Do not reproach your husband in public - it is humiliating!
  6. Keep your manners when others serve you - meaning do not treat anyone like a slave. In stores, do not act like a spoiled child. Be reasonable with your request, and treat people who serve you with respect. No put downs.
  7. When making a complaint about those who have not served you properly, do so in a diplomatic way, not gossiping and backstabbing them.
  8. Drive with manners! An expensive car owner should not be driving recklessly, cutting off other people, tailgating other cars, or rev the engine to show off. Doing all that just shows others one thing: your ego. And, no "suped up" cars - most are done without taste!
  9. Learn all you can about real estate and investing. You don't want to just spend your husband's money, but help him grow some too.
  10. Keep your job, or do something that makes some sort of income for yourself. Afterall, if the marriage is not good for you, you can walk off without regret!

Attracting a Millionaire Husband: Part II

Wednesday, November 15th, 2006

I decided to change the title to Attracting a Millionaire Husband, rather than staying with the Virgin Bride, since preference for virgin brides may be from a certain culture's preference - it may not be widely agreed with. And afterall, I am talking about how to dress in such a way that gives a girl a better exterior. So, in this entry I will talk about dressing.

There is a difference in dressing and grooming styles between the cultured and rich, and people who are not so privileged. Here's a list of hints that will give a person the impression of wealth and culture:

  • think classy rather than trendy in style
  • colours: neutrals rather than bold. If bold, not too often, and not too many, unless you are in the entertainment industry. I've mentioned in the previous post how millionaire men, at least in China, do not want someone who flaunts herself in PR or entertainment industry. So dressing to be the suportive woman requires her to be subtle and classy
  • knee length to long skirts. Forget about minis
  • elegant pumps, rather than wedged heeled boots
  • fine knits, rather than sweatshirts and t-shirts
  • fine metallic jewellery, preferably gold, silver or platinum. Plastics and fakes are not cool
  • precious stones, peals and semi-precious stones. Please - nothing too big or obviously big.
  • sleek, sophisticated hairdos, nothing big, teased or obviously dyed
  • silk stocking is a staple. Not leggings
  • fitted, tailored clothing. Think of a tailored suit.
  • subtle make up that enhances beauty, rather than dramatic make up. For example, a fine well drawn line from eyeliner rather than a big, bold smokey eye
  • clothes made of luxurious, natural material, rather than plastic
  • classic perfumes, rather than popular, trendy perfumes. Think of Miss Dior or Shalimar rather than products from J. Lo or Hilary Duff.

In a nutshell, think timelessness, classy and simplicity rather than "in" for the season.

Role models? Carolyn Bessette Kennedy and Jackie Kennedy Onassis.

Virgin Bride: Part I

Monday, November 13th, 2006

I read an article today, about how millionaires in China seek their brides. Some have no time to get out there and explore, so they rely on agencies to find their perfect brides. Most of these millionaires are in their 30's to 40's, and here is a common list of characteristics they look for -

  • young - girls in their twenties (preferably before 25)
  • fair skinned
  • pretty
  • educated
  • virgin

And here's a list of characteristics these millionaires do not want the candidates to possess -

  • too opinionated
  • work in the entertainment industry, or an industry that requires them to be out there, interacting with too many people (so I guess public relations is out)
  • dresses and grooms in a strange way (perhaps too dramatic?)
  • strong career women who overpowers their men
  • too academic that they don't know how to enjoy life

To me, the interesting part is not these lists. It is the fact that according to the article, about 70% interviewed want to compete to marry a millionaire. These are all women in white collar jobs. According to other sources, and this particular article, most women do want to marry for money - because money is security to them.

I will not talk about whether these men and women are right or wrong - I'm sure we each have our own opinion about that. These are some facts that I want to share.

These millionaires want a wife who stands behind them as their supportive wife. They do not want someone who compete to stand under the lime light. Why they want someone educated I'm not too sure - perhaps so that they can communicate in the same level, same wavelength, so to speak.

How would a woman dress and behave to be comfortable at the millionaire level? There are "class differences", I'm afraid, in dressing and behavior at different levels. If you want to attract a millionaire husband, stay tuned for the next few entries, in which I will share some tips on how to do that through dressing and grooming.

Power of Referral

Saturday, November 11th, 2006

We've all experienced this.

I'm not talking about great things about referrals. We all know that referrals are great, because we can trust our friends. And so whatever friends refer to us with enthusiasm, we tend to try, and sometimes maintain, without thinking it through thoroughly. I call this mindlessness.

Take this, for example, a person I know has gone to a hairdresser for a few years now, because he was referred to her from a very good friend. This person has almost never gotten a good haircut from this hairdresser. But she went back, time and time again. This has been going on for 5 or 6 years now.

Then, one day, she noticed his work deteriorated a little bit. That was her excuse anyway - but really, the work quality was of no difference from what she has had the many times before. But now she is willing to try someone else - assuming for whatever reason that the other person offers a better price, just because she noticed the seemingly good haircut of  another person has from this new hairdresser.

She visited this new hairdresser. The cut was a little better, but the price was also higher. The place was further than the location of the old hairdresser. I wonder what this person will do next - I think she would likely go back to the old hairdresser - given the closer location and price.

Moral of the story? There are two -

1. Referral is powerful - even if the product or service offering is bad, just as long as clients do not know the offering is bad, and are too lazy to make comparisons. This work for products that are not expensive and are convenient to get.

2. Mindlessness is costly - are your decisions costing your more than the benefits you reap from them?  Have you questioned the true benefits and drawbacks behind your purchases? The decisions you make daily?

Stepping Out of Your Comfort Zone

Thursday, November 9th, 2006

One of the major blocks to an image transformation that brings out 100% potential from a client, is a client's own unwillingness to change.

Change what? Changing the habits of the kinds of clothes that they wear! We all have habits that dictates our preferences for colors and styles. Sometimes we hold onto concepts of what a certain color or style that is bad for us (for eg, someone can say "I hate orange" but cannot name a reason for it). It can be quite frustrating for me at times to deal with such situations. Afterall, they have hired me to help them change. I've identified what needs to be changed. And all of a sudden old habits kick in.

I can just go along saying it is fine to go back to those habits, and accept the monies that come from the client without doing much, but that is unethical. Truly, I'd rather tell those clients that if they hire me for an image transformation, yet they are unwilling to change, I have to question why they have hired me first of all.

I understand that habits are hard to change - the pattern of how we do things are ingrained in us years ago from a need. But if the results produced from your current habits are not working for you - either results from your career, or results you feel internally about yourself, it's time to re-evaluate your habits.

Habits don't need to be changed all at once. Most of the time, unless something traumatic happens, our minds have a hard time changing habits. Take it a step at a time. For example, if you haven't worn make up before, but want to look more professional at work, begin with lipstick and foundation. Try it for 2 weeks. Then the third, week, add concealer and groom your brows. Keep adding on until you achieve your desired professional image.

Same with clothes - if you are not used to wearing, say, a certain range of color that is identified to be the best colors for you.  Try to wear that one color for a few hours for an occasion. Then in the next 12 months or so add some more of that range of color in your tops and bottoms.

The good news is, once you've managed to change a habit, you'd be surprised at the level of open mindedness you will develop. Changing habit, even a small one, is a breakthrough in and of itself. change your habit enough times, and you will be more willing to try new things, accept new ideas, and open yourself more to the world at large. There will be less fear for the unknown.

Try it, and see what surprises you discover about yourself. Change habits that do not work for you, and you will discover what work better for you.

Abundance vs. Taste

Monday, November 6th, 2006

An interesting incident happened in my family recently.

A member got married and moved out. She and her husband, somehow, were in such a hurry to decorate their homes. They took away some of the family's furniture that were in storage. Lights. Cords. Posters and paintings.

Seeing how odd it was, I asked the member: don't you want to develop your own taste so that your home will be decorated in the style that you want?

Reply I got: why waste these paintings?

Wow. So this is the mentality that the person had. To say it nicely, it is called a mentality for abundance. Take more. To put it more accurately, it is called greed - unwilling to spend even with a large combined salary, and take things that belong to others without thinking who else may want them. "I want. I want. I want."

Her husband...the way he takes food at dinner, it is as if he is competing for food. Our family never fights for food. Where did his habit come from?

From this incident, and other incidents, I've learned the following:

1. How we do anything, is how we do everything.

2. The people we hang around with (most importantly, our spouse / other half), we grow to become like them.

How do you decorate your home? How do you put together your outfits? And, what is your other half life?

Answering these questions will give you a picture of what you are within.

Oh, and by the way, abundance does not necessarily mean tasteful. It just means lots. Or in a bad case, too much.

Facial Scrub

Saturday, November 4th, 2006

I tried many commercially made facial scrub. I liked some, and disliked some. Also found some ridiculous - a certain brand that had round micro somethings that scrubs the skin off (they don't have to be completely round!!). After knowing the nasty ingredient lists of just about all the ones I've tried, I almost gave up on using a scrub.

A scrub is great for women who put on make up. Scrubbing the dead skin off makes the face a smoother "canvas" for the colors to be put on. A towel won't do it, and a loofah is too hard. I find that face brushes don't work well. So what did I do?

I remember a few years back sugar scrubs were popular - and they are still popular now. I searched for some recipes, and here are my versions for different types of skin. They are easy to make and store. Enjoy, and try the recipes at your own risk.

Sugar Scrub for Dry Skin:
1 part vegetable oil (one of the following: sweet almond oil, jojoba oil, or extra virgin olive oil)
2 parts white sugar
A few drops of your favorite perfume or essential oil (rose or ylang ylang essential oil recommended)
Mix the ingredients in a container. Use as needed.

Sugar Scrub for Oily Skin:
1 part liquid soap (I recommend Dr. Bronner's Baby Soap)
2 parts white sugar
A few drops of your favorite perfume or essential oil (lemon or orange essential oil recommended)
Mix the ingredients in a container. Use as needed.

Sugar Scrub for Normal Skin:
1 part liquid soap
2 parts white sugar
1/10 part vegetable oil (sweet almond, jojoba or extra virgin olive oil)
A few drops of your favorite perfume or essential oil
Mix the ingredients together, store in container and use as needed.

Sugar Scrub for Sensitive Skin:
Same as the normal skin recipe, just add 1/10 part of aloe vera gel juice into mixture. Stay away from  soap, oil or essential oil that you are sensitive to.