Anti Depression Guide

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by Susan

When we're down in the dumps and immobilized by depression we need to remember Nike's slogan, Just Do It!  Sometimes making ourselves do things we once enjoyed will help us move toward enjoying those things spontaneously again.   It make take a while but if we just do it, we may have success in breaking out of the doldrums.

I read a book review today that looks pretty interesting and motivational.   The book is called,  Just Do It! The Power of Positive Living, by Eray Honeycutt.   The book reminded me of the belief I have in making myself do things, even if I don't really want to at the time.  There are days when I don't want to get out and work my Avon route.   There are other days when I don't want to do my chores.  There have even been days during the growing season when I didn't want to go outside and work in my flowers. 

I'm not always successful at making myself just do it.  There are times when I have to give myself a good talking to....maybe even for days on end before I am able to discard the depression and get on with things.   Once I finally move in a positive direction, I start to feel better.  I believe we can use the slogan, Just Do It, as a way of improving our attitudes and our lives in general.   Give it a try.

by Susan

Those of us who suffer from anxiety and/or depression know how difficult it is to wait whether it be in a doctor's office, a traffic jam or a line at the grocery store.   Most of us usually manage to control our feelings and deal with these frequently occurring  problems of waiting.  When we are waiting on loved ones and family members it's much harder to understand and therefore deal with our feelings of anxiety.  Part of that anxiety includes the fear they may have had an accident.

Believing I have a reasonably good relationship with my adult children is what has caused me to plunge into a deep depression this year following the holidays.   After committing to specific days and times on both Thanksgiving and Christmas for several different events, various family members either didn't show up at all, or were very late.   Some didn't even bother to call.  I guess,  believing I have a good relationship with my adult children is a myth.  Nary a phone call or an apology.   Not even replies to repeated attempts to contact them. 

I've decided I'm finished with family gatherings.   I have to let go of the myth and recognize that many of my family members have a lack of respect and consideration for me.   I hate that they are suffering from their own mental health issues but that doesn't excuse rude behavior.   Making people wait for long periods of time,  or not showing up at all,  is rude and inconsiderate............even if it is just your mom, mother-in-law, or aunt.   Failing to call, or even text, makes it twice as hurtful.  "What we have here is a failure to communicate" (taken from the Paul Newman movie, Cool Hand Luke)

At times, it felt as though there was a sibling rivalry war going on over who could make everyone else wait the longest.   It wasn't fun.  I'm sure that must be my paranoia kicking in,  but that is how it felt.   I really enjoyed preparing for the holidays this year....maybe because somehow I knew it was to be the last one spent with everyone together in the same place at the same time.  

I won't allow them to keep me waiting, worrying and stressing like that again.   I believe the statement I've heard so many times, " we teach others how to treat us".   I need to do more teaching!  

by Susan

Let Go and Move On are things we are often told to do when we are trying to recover from something that has upset us.  Mental Health professionals, friends and relatives mean well and are correct in saying that's what we need to do.   However, letting go and moving on are often very difficult when it involves our relationships with family members. 

How many times are we expected to let go and move on with the same family members?   Is this why some families fall apart in time?   Do other family members get tired of all the stress?   In my opinion talking and even arguing about the issue is the best way to clear the air and move past the problems.   But, when some family members refuse to discuss anything more relevant than the weather, you have no choice but to deal with problems another way.   Let go and move on enter into play......but at what price? 

With each incident  It takes me longer to let go and move on when dealing with silent family members.  I know how difficult it will be to eventually get together and pretend it didn't happen.   I don't like dealing with that difficulty.....pretending.  I don't like denial in others and refuse to be in a state of denial myself.  I spent too many years in the past in a state of denial, with my head stuck in the sand.   It isn't healthy.   In my opinion, let go and move on is only good advice after the issue has been dealt with. 

I don't know if this article makes any sense to anyone but me, but I had to write it and I appreciate all who read it.