I'm doing a little better now. It always seems to me that I battle depression by taking baby steps towards feeling better. It's been difficult to deal with family relationships lately because not one person in the family wants to talk about what happened between my older sister and myself. I have to do all my talking to myself. Now that sounds like a crazy person for sure. lol
I think the recovery process takes longer when not one person who was involved in the mayhem wants to be involved in the healing now. Pretending nothing happened and going on about our business is the method that has always been used in my family of origin. I personally hate that method and believe it only causes bad feelings to fester.
Taking baby steps and sharing my feelings with my husband have both been helpful. One of the steps I have taken is to focus my attention on my Dad's journal. I've been typing it one page at a time and sharing it on the family Website for all the relatives to see. Most of them didn't know he had even written a journal. I've been enjoying this project and it is helping me to heal. I believe one family member is sending the documents to my sister who was banned from the site...and that's okay.
I've felt sad about banning her and would take her back in a minute if she ever wants to talk with me about our differences. I couldn't let her continue to treat me with disrespect on the family site though. Overall, the family site is a farce. People aren't interested in sharing their lives with each other. The younger folks enjoyed reading the memories of the older ones and everyone enjoys the pictures a few of us have posted. However, participation by most members is very low....and always has been.
It's not healthy when a 65 year old person is still upset by members of their family of origin. You would think by now, I would be able block their words and actions from hurting me. I'll never forget something my Dad said to me when I was a teen. I had complained to him about something my sisters said or did and his response was, "you know how your sisters are". To this day I still know....but still wish it wasn't so.
Archive for the ‘senior citizens’ Category
Battling Depression With Baby Steps
Saturday, February 4th, 2012Depression, a Battle Again!
Wednesday, January 18th, 2012
I wonder if it's just this time of year that has me fighting the battle of depression again. I know the holidays are famous for people being depressed but my worst time is after they are over. It's probably because the weather gets cold and I have a tendency to get sick. I'm plagued with sinus infections. It also gets lonesome.
Since I booted my older sister from the family site, I've felt really sad that once again our relationship bombed. I don't think it's possible for her to like me. A number of people said, "good" when I told them she was gone. It was obvious how hateful she was being. I'm sure many think otherwise and I still feel like crawling back in my hole but here I am.
I've been studying my Dad's journal. He wrote it in the '80's and I've had it all this time. He passed away in 1990. I have read bits and pieces over the years but never really delved into it much....it was too painful. It's still painful, but now I'm not only reading it but posting it for my brother, remaining two sisters and other relatives to see. This is probably not helping my depression but it feels like something I need to do right now. He sure loved his family!
I feel much love for my family and that is always what gets me through these really bad bouts of depression. Right now knowing my son will be over later today, or knowing I'll see my granddaughter this weekend are great things that motivate me to get up and do something. I've been gaining weight and really hope I will manage to motivate myself to do something about that soon.
I really think motivation is the key to winning the battle against depression. I'm trying hard to muster up my motivation this time.
Since I booted my older sister from the family site, I've felt really sad that once again our relationship bombed. I don't think it's possible for her to like me. A number of people said, "good" when I told them she was gone. It was obvious how hateful she was being. I'm sure many think otherwise and I still feel like crawling back in my hole but here I am.
I've been studying my Dad's journal. He wrote it in the '80's and I've had it all this time. He passed away in 1990. I have read bits and pieces over the years but never really delved into it much....it was too painful. It's still painful, but now I'm not only reading it but posting it for my brother, remaining two sisters and other relatives to see. This is probably not helping my depression but it feels like something I need to do right now. He sure loved his family!
I feel much love for my family and that is always what gets me through these really bad bouts of depression. Right now knowing my son will be over later today, or knowing I'll see my granddaughter this weekend are great things that motivate me to get up and do something. I've been gaining weight and really hope I will manage to motivate myself to do something about that soon.
I really think motivation is the key to winning the battle against depression. I'm trying hard to muster up my motivation this time.
Turkey Day at the Kings
Saturday, November 22nd, 2008by Susan
While preparing to give thanks this Thanksgiving, I have been gathering the food for what we also call Turkey Day at our house. I'm so relieved to say we finally have a new refrigerator and I've spent the last two days going from one grocery store to the next shopping for the holiday bargains and filling up the freezer. I know I got the best prices around for the feast my only daughter and I will prepare on Thursday.
My husband and I are senior citizens and these holiday gatherings cause us a lot stress even though I absolutely love them! Now that's definitely a conflict of emotions! It must be associated with my underlying depression. Last night we realized we are going to have a really crowded table and we're trying to come up with a good solution. No kiddie table for us this year since the only child will be my 18 month old granddaughter. The daughter of my middle son and his wife. Maybe we'll have an old folks table for me and the hubby. Then we can sit back and watch as our children interact with each other. That's always been one of my favorite things to do.
I am especially thankful this year because my oldest son will be home for this holiday. I'm so happy that he is able to come home before going to Iraq in early December. I'm also happy to have my youngest son and his new bride for Thanksgiving this year.
I've seen a lot of funny and touching holiday movies where family members might fight, hug, play games, tease each other and be bored with each other. My family would make a wonderful movie and I'm sure everyone would love it. I think I'll call it "Turkey Day at the Kings ".
Baby Boomers and Depression
Sunday, October 12th, 2008by Susan
I was interviewed by phone not long ago by Darlene Dunn of Newsnet5.com out of Ohio for an article she wrote about Baby Boomers and their life changes that can trigger depression. Before I give you the link to that interview I'd like to let you know that I am a Baby Boomer who has suffered with depression since my early 30's. I sought professional help, tried a number of anti-depressants and each one worked for me for a period of time. Psychotherapy was the most effective for me.
My brother, David, has received a great deal of help from both anti-depressants and Psychotherapy. In my opinion, senior citizens and people in all age groups need to seek professional help when they suffer from depression for more than a few weeks. The professional will help you decide what will be of most help for you.
I do believe that life changes during Baby Boomer years or anytime in our lives can trigger depression. Problems in your relationships can trigger depression as easily as major changes such as loss of a loved one or loss of a job.
On a personal note, my husband and I have been married for 42 years and we've shared a lot of good times as well as some problems. My children are all gone from home now and all are loving and successful adults. It was difficult for me to be a stay at home mom and even though I wasn't always the best mom, I did a good job. The loss of each of my parents was devastating to me and caused me a great deal of depression. I think a lot of Baby Boomers find themselves dealing with this same kind of loss.
My husband retired in 2005, at which time we needed to cut our expenses and I stopped seeing my psychologist on a regular basis and took up blogging. Blogging is definitely cheaper although it isn't nearly as effective as seeing a professional on a regular basis. I prefaced the interview with this article because I am a firm believer in seeking professional help if you suffer from depression and I don't think that point is made in the article. You can read the interview by Darlene Dunn at Newsnet5.com. It is titled, Boomer's Life Changes Can Start Depression.
I Wish I Looked Different
Friday, September 12th, 2008
by Susan
Sometimes I really wish I looked different. We go through life with this one body and even though we try to keep it healthy and looking it's best we may be dissatisfied with how we look. I am. Women like myself, who are senior citizens, probably understand very well how this dissatisfaction with our appearance can worsen with age.
I keep hoping I will get to the point where I'm comfortable wearing red and purple, and don't care too much anymore about how I look, but I'm not there yet. My self esteem has always been connected to how I feel about my appearance. Lately, I haven't had good self esteem.
My hair is thinning and my waistline is thickening. I know both of these things often happen to senior citizens in spite of exercise and eating right. I know aging is a normal process but by golly......we don't have to like it. I want to age gracefully and happily and I know acceptance is the key to achieving that wish. I'm just not ready. I wish I looked different.........younger, thinner and happier.
I know I'm not the only one who feels this way. According to one article I found, many people are actually Obsessing On Body Image. I'm not obsessing yet, but just having a rant tonight. Thanks for reading.
Sometimes I really wish I looked different. We go through life with this one body and even though we try to keep it healthy and looking it's best we may be dissatisfied with how we look. I am. Women like myself, who are senior citizens, probably understand very well how this dissatisfaction with our appearance can worsen with age.
I keep hoping I will get to the point where I'm comfortable wearing red and purple, and don't care too much anymore about how I look, but I'm not there yet. My self esteem has always been connected to how I feel about my appearance. Lately, I haven't had good self esteem.
My hair is thinning and my waistline is thickening. I know both of these things often happen to senior citizens in spite of exercise and eating right. I know aging is a normal process but by golly......we don't have to like it. I want to age gracefully and happily and I know acceptance is the key to achieving that wish. I'm just not ready. I wish I looked different.........younger, thinner and happier.
I know I'm not the only one who feels this way. According to one article I found, many people are actually Obsessing On Body Image. I'm not obsessing yet, but just having a rant tonight. Thanks for reading.
Undecided Voter
Friday, September 5th, 2008by Susan
If my dad were alive he would vote for John McCain. If my grandchildren were old enough to vote they would vote for Barack Obama. I'm an undecided voter and as a senior citizen it puzzles me to be undecided at this time in my life. I usually make up my mind early. Somehow, this seems like a very important election to me......more so than all the other presidential elections I've voted in over the years.
Maybe my indecision has to do with increased depression.......I'm not sure. I do know that I feel a certain amount of anxiety associated with this election. This has been one of the most interesting races to date and I've probably spent too much time sitting around watching television and the Internet in an effort to learn as much as possible about the candidates and the issues.
I feel a bit of anger when some of my loved ones tell me who they are voting for and they haven't listened to the speeches of all the candidates. They obviously base their decision on something else.....but what? Have they done some other kind of homework so they are informed? Maybe I'm taking my one vote too seriously.
I found an interesting article about undecided voters at WebMD and learned that I may not be undecided at all. I just don't know it yet.
Senior Citizens and Depression
Tuesday, August 19th, 2008
by Susan
As a senior citizen I can tell you that depression isn't any easier to deal with as you get older. I'm sure that must also be true for most mental health problems. The mere fact of advancing age sometimes causes me a great deal of sadness. This past week I also felt a lot of anger due to my having to let go of some of the things I love to do.
For many years I have been an avid gardener. I loved growing roses, perennials, annuals and even some vegetables now and then. We have a big yard and I had many large flower beds. During the growing season you usually found me outside digging in the dirt planting flowers or pulling weeds. I dug the flower beds, hauled rocks to build the borders for the beds and hauled the bags of mulch. It has been one of my favorite hobbies through the years.
However, the past few years it has been more and more difficult for me to do all of the necessary work to keep my gardens looking nice. This year because of all the rain, the weeds in some areas were soon taller than I am. Last week one of my neighbors complained. So, my husband and I worked all weekend and we totally eliminated two large flower beds. My feet are still sore from digging! I plan to do the same with some of the remaining flower beds. My gardening hobby will have to be limited, but I will still enjoy it.
Senior citizens have to deal with a lot of acceptance when it comes to their continually decreasing physical abilities. Even with regular exercise and good health habits we all get older and dealing with it can be depressing at times. It's a good thing there are some perks to being a senior too. Watching my grandson grow five inches in one year can be even more fascinating than growing plants. Hearing my one year old granddaughter call me Nana cheers me up in no time.
One of my prized flower beds just a few years ago.
As a senior citizen I can tell you that depression isn't any easier to deal with as you get older. I'm sure that must also be true for most mental health problems. The mere fact of advancing age sometimes causes me a great deal of sadness. This past week I also felt a lot of anger due to my having to let go of some of the things I love to do.
For many years I have been an avid gardener. I loved growing roses, perennials, annuals and even some vegetables now and then. We have a big yard and I had many large flower beds. During the growing season you usually found me outside digging in the dirt planting flowers or pulling weeds. I dug the flower beds, hauled rocks to build the borders for the beds and hauled the bags of mulch. It has been one of my favorite hobbies through the years.
However, the past few years it has been more and more difficult for me to do all of the necessary work to keep my gardens looking nice. This year because of all the rain, the weeds in some areas were soon taller than I am. Last week one of my neighbors complained. So, my husband and I worked all weekend and we totally eliminated two large flower beds. My feet are still sore from digging! I plan to do the same with some of the remaining flower beds. My gardening hobby will have to be limited, but I will still enjoy it.
Senior citizens have to deal with a lot of acceptance when it comes to their continually decreasing physical abilities. Even with regular exercise and good health habits we all get older and dealing with it can be depressing at times. It's a good thing there are some perks to being a senior too. Watching my grandson grow five inches in one year can be even more fascinating than growing plants. Hearing my one year old granddaughter call me Nana cheers me up in no time.
One of my prized flower beds just a few years ago.
Depression During a Heat Wave: His and Hers
Sunday, August 3rd, 2008
by Susan
Depression can become almost as overwhelming as the soaring temperatures when a heat wave lasts more than a few days in your part of the world. Here in Missouri we are having temperatures in the mid to upper 90's with very high humidity which causes the heat index to be over 100 degrees.
When heat keeps us indoors we can begin to suffer from cabin fever which is usually associated with being snowed in during the winter months. We can get just as bored and feel just as cut off from friends and neighbors in August as we can in February. Senior citizens are especially affected by long hot summer days.
If you find yourself feeling down from staying indoors during a heat wave, try doing something new such as trying a new hobby or rent some new movies. One of my favorite things t do is to learn something new on the computer. Learning new things can hold our interest for long periods of time.
If you feel you must get out of the house be sure to use good sense and stay hydrated. I found an excellent source of information on dealing with the heat during extended periods of hot weather. http://www.disastercenter.com/guide/heat.html This site has a lot of tips on coping with the physical problems related to heat waves. If you have mental health problems as well, try something new to keep your mind off your troubles and the heat. Maybe there is a new book you've been dying to read.
Please visit:
Ozzie's Place
Depression can become almost as overwhelming as the soaring temperatures when a heat wave lasts more than a few days in your part of the world. Here in Missouri we are having temperatures in the mid to upper 90's with very high humidity which causes the heat index to be over 100 degrees.
When heat keeps us indoors we can begin to suffer from cabin fever which is usually associated with being snowed in during the winter months. We can get just as bored and feel just as cut off from friends and neighbors in August as we can in February. Senior citizens are especially affected by long hot summer days.
If you find yourself feeling down from staying indoors during a heat wave, try doing something new such as trying a new hobby or rent some new movies. One of my favorite things t do is to learn something new on the computer. Learning new things can hold our interest for long periods of time.
If you feel you must get out of the house be sure to use good sense and stay hydrated. I found an excellent source of information on dealing with the heat during extended periods of hot weather. http://www.disastercenter.com/guide/heat.html This site has a lot of tips on coping with the physical problems related to heat waves. If you have mental health problems as well, try something new to keep your mind off your troubles and the heat. Maybe there is a new book you've been dying to read.
Please visit:
Ozzie's Place